I'm flying to Park City in a couple hours and I have the distinct sense that I might die there this weekend. In the event that my plane crashes, an avalanche buries me, or I succumb to alcohol poisoning, I would like to memorialize herein the following:
to my Mom: my 401k and all investments
to UC Berkeley: my library
to my buddy Dave: my Cal football season tickets and my 57" Sony Bigscreen
to my buddy Don: my Raiders season tickets
to my little cousin Russ: all my baseball cards
to my sister: eternal damnation for being a selfish, manipulative pig
to my buddy Tom: my pair of seats from Veterans Stadium
to my roommates: all my furniture
to the world: my everlasting legacy, bitches
to Stanford University: all my debt and a big fat FUCK YOU, FUCKERS!
Posted by nils at 2:37 PM